Never Say Never - Chapter Two

Chapter Two .. .. Foreclosure, Embarrassment and Humiliation




“Zoey Lewis,” I informed the secretary numbly. I was still taken aback from Josh’s outburst. In fact, I couldn’t get my mind off of it. I really was a lousy friend. I’d have to find a way to make it up to him.



But for now I am stuck in front of a large dark maple desk, dealing with the issue that made me get in the dispute with Josh.



“Mrs. Tuttle wants to speak with you in her office. Your mother is there.”



My heart beat faster and harder. Something was horribly wrong. The last time my mother came to my school was in fifth grade when my dog, Dashes, died. And before that, in 2nd grade, she arrived to inform me that my favorite great grandfather passed away. So this couldn’t be good.



The secretary lifted her hand, gesturing towards another hallway.



“Down that hall, first door on the left,” she told me.



Every step I took towards that room that she was telling me directions to was forced. I didn’t want to go in there. I didn’t want to hear any more bad news. Although, my legs kept moving like they normally did.





I sighed as I knocked on the door once, and then opened it slowly. It creaked as it flew wide open. Sitting in a chair beside a large maple desk was my mother. She wasn’t smiling, and either was Mrs. Tuttle. In fact, they were very solemn as they stared straight at me. This was very ghastly.



“Mom…”



She took in a sharp breath, but it caught in her throat when she exhaled. Her eyes were red, and it looked as if she had been crying.



“Darling…we foreclosed on our house. This has been going on for a few months now. That’s why I had been packing things up in boxes. It wasn’t because we were having the rummage sale like I said. I’m sorry I lied, but I couldn’t tell you,” she said between gasps. Now she was really sobbing. I froze in the middle of the doorway. My feet wouldn’t move. My face was blank, and I didn’t show any of the expressions I was feeling inside. All I really wanted to do was scream, throw a fit, and yammer on about how bad life was. However, I stayed mute. I have to be strong for her, since this is a lot harder on my mom than it is for me.



I can’t actually believe that she kept this from me. I should have realized when she started packing things up. Especially when she made me bundle up all of my clothing, and made me clean up my bedroom, and when she was mass-cleaning every room…but I didn’t apprehend it. Other things have been on my mind lately; like grades, and boys, and friends. Or maybe it’s because I’ve been walking around my house like a zombie lately. Ever since Jacob, my old boyfriend, broke up with me I have been like this. The relationship wasn’t even that serious, but it still affected me. However, I should have seen the signs. I should have read the warnings. But I didn’t. I must be the most oblivious person in the entire planet.



Mrs. Tuttle glanced at me curiously as she rapped her hands soundlessly on the desk.



“Where are we going to live?” I finally inquired softly. My face almost softened, but when I realized that I turned it back to what it was before; impassive and stony.



She didn’t speak for a few moments as she tried to gain control. Mrs. Tuttle shuffled in her drawer for something. When she pulled out a cardboard box and handed it to my mother I knew exactly what it was; Kleenex. Mom whipped out four of them and brought them up to her face, wiping her eyes and nose. My heart broke watching her; however I didn’t display the pain. I locked it up inside of me. Just like I did all throughout my life.



“With Lucinda,” she answered softly after several minutes. Lucinda was Josh’s mother. She was a successful, affluent, single-parent who inherited a lot of money when her father and husband died. Lucinda was also very arrogant, selfish, and spoiled. Whatever she wanted, she got. Josh didn’t like her much and neither did I. Lucinda, however, tended to bond with my mother. Henceforth, Lucinda would take us in if we ever had some financial problems; like she just proved to me.



“You’ll be getting one of the spare rooms to yourself, and Becky will get her own. All of your stuff is already in there…your father and I moved it today,” she told me, sniffling into her many tissues. Mrs. Tuttle didn’t say a thing. She watched my mother and I have our discussion with pity in her eyes. Mrs. Tuttle felt bad for us all. However, I didn’t need her sympathy, my family and I would be fine without it.



“One question, mom, why are you telling me this in the middle of the school day?” I asked, instead of commenting on the living situations.



It took her a moment to reply, “Because if you rode the same bus as you did yesterday then you would be going to a house that doesn’t belong to us any longer. So, you will be switching over to Josh’s bus.”



“That was exactly what I needed,” I thought, rolling my eyes discretely. The day that I move in with Josh and his mother just so happens to be one of the only times that we are in a ‘fight’.



The bell rang directly above me. It nearly made me jump out of my skin.



“Oh. I understand. Can I go back to class now?”



My mother frowned at me. Maybe I crossed the line from being unreadable to being discourteous. Although, I didn’t bother myself much with that. I wanted to go back to learning. That was better than having to have this conversation. Anything would be better than this. I’d rather cheer for the Lakers in the basketball finals than be here, and that is something I would never do; seeing as how I am a true Boston Celtics fan.



Without another word I left abruptly. I couldn’t take it anymore. The grief was overwhelming me, and I did not particularly favor being sad. Even though I knew it was rude, I couldn’t care less. Honestly, I didn’t even know why there was so much sorrow. I mean other than our house being foreclosed there was nothing wrong. My dysfunctional family was completely intact, and we still had food on the table. So, in my book, everything was decent. Not great, but not as horrible as it could get. If we had to live on the streets then I’d be singing a different tune.





For seven minutes all I did was lean against the wall, trying not to cry. I needed to grab my bearings. Well after the bell rang, signaling the beginning of class, did I finally move.



As I walked down the hallway I spotted a shadow of a person around the corner. It was not moving, not even an inch, and yet the person was standing up. I neared it carefully, since I wasn’t in the mood to confront anyone right now, and I didn’t know whose shadow it was. It was just like normal; a trouble-making student sent to stand out in the hall. Although, something about it was different. I’m not sure how, or why. Maybe it was the way he rose; his stature. He seemed athletic, but I couldn’t tell you for sure. That is, I wouldn’t be able to until I actually laid my eyes on him.



I rounded the corner, waiting for the person to reveal themselves. My eyes widened as I saw him. He was the owner of that strange shadow. He was one of the most gorgeous guys I have ever laid my eyes on. His short, brown and blonde streaked hair really flattered his skin tone. The guy’s clothing was also in tip-top shape. He seemed like the type of person who all the guys wanted to be like, and all the girls want to be with.



My feet shuffled together, making a tiny sound, as I passed by him. If only I could speak to him…however, I wasn’t up to any more conversations. I might just explode my feelings onto him. What kind of first appearance is that? I’d start crying, freaking out, and I’d probably even slam myself into something. When I am a mixture of sad and angry I tend to hurt either myself or someone else.



Either way it goes, I wouldn’t be very attractive to him, or anyone, if I behaved that way. So it’s best that I just keep on going.



“Hey,” a gentle voice called from behind me. Someone -the boy- jogged up to me. He grabbed my arm and made me freeze in my tracks. This beautifully crafted God of a man wanted to talk to me. I knew I couldn’t talk to him…I just couldn’t.



Nevertheless, I did.



“Hi,” I replied softly, looking up at him with a small smile on my lips.



“My name’s Connor Sanders, what’s yours?”



Connor. His name sent shivers down my spine. That was the name of the best basketball player at the school. I hadn’t even recognized him! Boy, was I oblivious! Then again, I have been for the longest time. I just need to accept that fact and move on.



“Zoey Lewis,” I mumbled, biting on my lower lip anxiously and gazing up into his startling blue eyes. Now that I knew exactly who he was, I was even more nervous than what I was before. The more I looked at him, the more I realized why I hadn’t known his proper title; he had gotten a haircut, and gained a little bit of weight. The growth was all for the better though. Now he was improved and even sexier than what he was before.



I blushed as I caught him staring down at me.



“It’s nice to meet you, Zoey.”



I just smiled and nodded. How come whenever I meet a cute guy my knees become wobbly, my head swoons, I overheat, and I act like a complete idiot? If only I knew, so that way I could fix it. Or at least learn how to live with it.




“I’ve got to get going. Maybe I’ll see you around,” I told him, breaking my gaze with him. As I walked away, I looked back at him once. I couldn’t help myself. It’s been a very long time, almost one year, since I’ve felt this way about anyone other than Jacob. I’d probably still feel this way towards him if he hadn’t broken up with me. That was one of the hardest break-up’s I have ever gone through.



I was almost to my second hour classroom when I did the unthinkable, yet very predictable thing. I should have been expecting it. But the truth of the matter is, I was under complete surprise when I tripped over my own two feet. I found myself sprawled to the ground with my stuff strewed all over the place. Rapidly, I regained my composure and grabbed all of school paraphernalia. Hastily I stood up and whirled around, looking in every direction to see who seen my humiliating moment.



Connor was laughing so hard that his face was turning purple. He was the only person I wished hadn’t seen my encounter, but of course, he had to be the one to witness it. I wanted to cry. Finally my shell was cracking, and the information I had just received was finally too much to handle. Before I could completely break down I rushed into my History class, rubbing my eyes so that there was no sight of any tears.







“Zoey, so nice of you to join us. Take your seat,” Mrs. Vansmith commanded coldly in an amused tone. She took happiness in seeing others suffer. I was in no mood to argue, so I did as told silently and respectfully. Mrs. Vansmith was quite possibly the meanest and most insensitive woman in the entire universe, and no one liked her. At least, no one I knew did.



I hurried to the only available chair in the back of the classroom. Of course, it was right next to Josh. It really is ironic that I have so many classes with him, when he is clearly mad at me and wishing we had none together. Really, I wouldn’t be shocked to learn that he hates me. Although, I don’t think he has such strong and vulgar feelings towards me quite yet. However, it could advance towards that if I didn’t try and rectify our friendship now. Honestly, we were ‘arguing’ over the stupidest things. Just thinking about that made me sad that our relationship could be dashed over one little fight. I think we will make it through this though, since our bond is strong. It has been since, like, forever. Hopefully we can correct it soon. Right now I think I need him more than I have in a long time.



I tried to catch his eye, but he was absorbed in his textbook. Josh flipped through the pages effortlessly, observed with the text on it. Mrs. Vansmith’s voice droned on and on. She was the most boring person in the world. If I was allowed to fall asleep right now, I would. No wonder I don’t have an A+ in this class. The only person that does is Josh. Then again, he already knew all of this stuff beforehand.



I sighed, and observed my thick hardback.



“Is there a problem, Miss Lewis?” Mrs. Vansmith asked. I could feel everyone’s gaze, and I’m sure my face flushed several shades darker than normal. She walked down the isle of students to me.



“Uh, no. But there is something I’d like to share.”



I’ve been meaning to tell her something. It’s about time I stood up for myself. I always let her stomp all over me. Even though she is a teacher, and normally would deserve the utmost respect, she was really getting under my skin. And I wouldn’t allow it this time.



Josh finally looked at me. It was as if he was warning me to keep my cool. Maybe it would be wise to listen to his unsaid instruction. I tried to clear my head. Really, with my anger zapped away, I realized how stupid it would be for me to confront her.



“Oh, and what would that be?” she inquired, raising an eyebrow. I wondered if she knew what I had intended on saying. She probably did. At least, it seemed like it.



“Um, just that you are a great teacher,” I said through clenched teeth. It was a blow to the pride having to say that. What I wanted to say was a lot worse, and I couldn’t risk saying it. It would probably get me seven weeks of detention, or even a small suspension.



Josh sent me a small smile and returned to his previous actions. I would need to talk to him after class. You know, to thank him for his cool head. He really was a good friend.



“Well, then, let’s resume class,” Mrs. Vansmith said, startled as she went back to the front of the classroom.









“Josh, I’m sorry. I’m a terrible friend. Please forgive me?” I couldn’t wait until after class. I needed to resolve this now. It always broke my heart when we fought.



He glanced at me again out of the corner of his eye. Josh bit his lower lip and pretended to think about it. He had this funny face put on like a mask.



“Yes, I will. It’s about time you apologized. ”



I grinned, and stifled a laugh.



“Zoey, who was the 20th president of the United States of America?”



Of course, Mrs. Vansmith would ask me that question. I know it was review, but we only learned the first 20 presidents in 8th grade. We haven’t even gone over it until this year. How am I supposed to remember that after all of this time?



Josh moved his lips. I’m sure he was trying to tell me the answer, but I was never a good lip reader. I looked at him helplessly, and he rolled his eyes. Speedily he wrote it down.



“Oh, it’s James A. Garfield!” I exclaimed, slapping my forehead as if I had forgotten but then remembered.



Josh shook his head, chuckling to himself.





When class finally ended a good twenty minutes later, I gathered up my stuff and waited for Josh by the door.



“Thanks for the save back there.”



“You’re welcome,” he replied smugly, hooking his arm through mine as he led me to my next hour. It really was great having him around. Now I just needed to stay on his good side. Especially since I’ll be living with him for quite a while.

Never Say Never - Chapter One

author's note: this story has not been edited since the creation in 1/2/09

Preface

I’ve never seen the day where everything turns in my favor. Nothing is ever perfect. Sure, there are some good things, but there are horrible things, too. Like public embarrassment, and speaking in front of a large group of people for more than two minutes. It’s too bad all of those things are practically necessary in my life.



Chapter One- A.K.A the “lousy friend”



“Zoey Lewis, you are needed at the principals office,” the loud, raspy, voice of the secretary spoke over the intercom, cutting off Mrs. Hawthorne’s repetitive speech about verbs. My head flung upward towards the unexpected noise, and I blinked rapidly; the surprise knocked me speechless. Childish gasps broke through the classroom, as did snickers. They always did this whenever someone got called down. I swear all these 11th graders act more like 7 year olds rather than their proper age; which is 17 in most cases. Quickly I gathered my notebook and folders into my arms, glanced at Mrs. Hawthorne, and nearly ran out of that room. It was embarrassing to have your name said throughout the whole building, and I hated humiliating myself. Already I did enough of that on my own. I didn’t need the help of the secretary, too.

Lockers passed by in a blur as I speedily walked through the halls, heading down to the main entrance. Beside the two big, swinging, doors was the office. It was the standard position for most schools; right next to the doors was that crowded room that you never wanted to be sent.


Before I actually reached my goal, Josh Cramer, my best friend since 1st grade, stepped out of one of the classrooms. When he saw me, he grinned and inclined his head toward the ceiling. I rolled my eyes at him, because I knew exactly what he was referring to. It was about what just happened only moments ago. Even though it wouldn’t seem like a big deal for most people, it was an atrocious moment in my life.

Josh knew me too well. The reason for that is probably because we’ve known each other for so long, and we’ve studied each other’s reactions and thoughts about different subjects. It’s been like that ever since day one of my life in Michigan.
There’s a sort of funny story behind our friendship. In first grade I had just moved to the area, and it was my first day. I didn’t know anyone here; my mother and father had packed me, my sister, and our stuff up and shipped our small four-people family off to Bay City, Michigan. It was morning recess, and the air was cold. This was new weather for me, because I’ve always lived in a warm climate. I was playing on the swing set, watching all the guys run around and chase each other, and a few girls, when I saw him. He -Josh- was sitting by himself on a bench that leaned against the brick wall. Josh was twiddling with his fingers, and watching the sky. His peculiar brown-green eyes didn’t seem to ever blink!


All of a sudden a tall, chubby 6th grader came around the corner. He was wearing all black, with a dark, navy blue backpack swung over his shoulder. He already had a receding hair line, too, but what was left of it was greased back with hair gel. His sweatshirt was very baggy, and it was quite unflattering, even though I wasn’t completely concentrating on that. Really, I was staring at the adorable defenseless kid on the chair as I pumped my legs, pushing myself up higher on the swing. Josh was so small compared to the bully! He rolled his eyes as the black figure grinned maliciously down at him. I waited, and watched the scene play on. I remember being terrified beyond belief, and I had a compelling need to cover my own blue eyes and run away. But I didn’t.

The scary guy, later known as Cougar, clenched the front of Josh’s shirt and lifted him off the wood. I gasped as Josh’s legs flailed and kicked at Cougar’s legs. That angered Cougar.


“You’re in my seat,” he warned through gritted teeth. Cougar was very late to say that. Normally you would say that before you pick someone up. Josh said nothing back. This time it was me that reacted. Without thinking, I jumped off my swing, landed face first on the grass, picked myself back up, and ran over to the pair.

I was wondering where the noon-aid’s were. That way they could protect us. However, it seems they are always gone when we need them most. I ignored all of those unnecessary thoughts. Instead I focused on what I would do next.


I didn’t have to ponder for very long. I kicked Cougar so hard in the shins that he dropped Josh and fell to the floor grasping his knee. My power was pretty high-rate for a first grader. Josh landed right beside him on the ground. Quickly, I gave him my hand and helped him to his feet. He flashed me an embarrassed grin, but pulled me across the playground over to an isolated area. From that moment on we clicked. It was as if we were made for each other.

*~*~*~*~*

Something Josh said made me snap out of my day dream. As he rambled on and on, he talked faster and in a more flustered manner. That’s when I wondered what he was speaking about. Whatever it was, it was something he was passionate about. I now deeply regretted not paying attention to him. But just as soon as his rambling started, it ceased.

Josh stopped suddenly. It was so unexpected that I kept walking a few steps, but I eventually paused as he grabbed my hand and tugged me, backwards, towards him, in a way that almost made me trip over my own feet. Within a blink of an eye the Janitor’s closet, which was only a few feet away, flew open as Josh pulled on the handle. Then he yanked me in while I protested quietly.


When he shut the door all of the light flow disappeared. I was locked in a musty closet. He was staring at me with his finger to his mouth, warning me to stay silent. So that’s what I did, even though there were millions of things I wanted to say, no yell, at him about. I leaned against the wall, crossed my arms in front of my chest and waited. Although, I had no idea why or what for. Josh was acting pretty bizarre today. Then again, he’s been known to be pretty strange sometimes. Still. This was a new one for him.
“Josh-”
“Shh!” he hissed, cutting me off and giving me the death glare (with tons of love, of course), and pressed up against the door. I frowned at him, but stayed forlornly mute. Even though he wasn’t my mother or father, and I didn’t have to listen to him, I did anyways. It was common courtesy, and I am a very respectful person. (Or so I’m told.)

As a shadow of a person passed across the glass of the window, Josh let out the breath he was holding. He also leaned towards me in a friendlier stance. My brain was stuck in slow-motion. All of his emotions and reactions to things were so…weird, and hard to follow.
“What…is going on?” I asked after I finally got my thoughts pulled together. I’d decided to ask only the most important questions in the limited time we had. Since in a moment I would have to go to the office before I got in major trouble. Josh ran his hand through his hair. This was his normal response to an awkward question. However, I didn’t see anything unusual with what I inquired.

“Josh, tell me,” I commanded with a hopeful, gentle, smile on my lips.


“Well, you see, nothing is wrong…per se,” he said sheepishly, grinning his cute, toothy smile at me. I rolled my eyes. If he was trying to sell me his idea, he was failing horribly at it.


“Josh,” I said again, this time with an edge that expressed the hidden warning behind my words.

“Oh, okay,” he began, sighing, as the corners of his lips fell flat. I missed his smile already. It was one of his best assets, that gosh-darn grin of his was.


I watched him fidget with his shirt. He tugged at it until it lay just like he wanted it to; partly covering his stylish tan belt, and at the same time staying some-what baggy at his stomach. I have to admit that he was pretty cute. He had those brown eyes that made some girls want to faint. I wasn’t one of those girls, though. Especially since I couldn’t even imagine us together… well, maybe if I tried hard enough. My point, however, is that most ladies swoon over him, due to how gorgeous he is. He has a lot of crushes, and he also is very popular. Even though I’m weighing him down, he insists on sticking by my side. Josh is such a sweetheart. I really don’t deserve him.


“I have another bully.”
My mind reeled back in shock. He hasn’t had a bully since elementary school. Ever since he befriended one of the coolest guys in the school Josh hasn’t been picked on once. Now, even though he wasn’t friends with the same guy, he has just as much popular friends, and yet he’s getting harassed again.
“You do?”

“Yes,” he replied in a monotonous voice as he nodded swiftly once and stared at the dirty, debris covered, floor. There were filthy mops, dishrags (for god only knows why!), shoes, an extra set of keys, and finally a broken camera lying around. I was careful not to step on any of the stuff.
“Oh. Well, let’s talk about that later. How did you plan your exit at the same time as I did?” I quizzed, changing subjects to something else. Obviously the previous topic was bothering him, so I might as well switch it to a different thing that I was wondering about. I didn’t want to press into the bully thing right now. Later on I could casually bring it up, but now was not the time.
“Oh, that. I needed to talk to you. I heard your voice on the intercom so I asked Mr. Jenkins if I could be excused,” his voice still held the same tone. His answer made sense, though, so I just nodded. What he said caught my attention though. Apparently he needed to speak with me.
“What did you want to tell me?”
“I already told you,” he said, glowering. I stared at him blankly. So that was what he was so flustered about earlier! And I didn’t pay attention to him. Wow, what a great friend I am.
“Well, that proves how much you care about what I have to say,” he stated simply as he left. The door almost hit me in the face as he slammed it closed. I can’t even remember the last time he was so angry. So, it must have been some really important detail I missed.
I feel so guilty now. All because of Josh. Maybe if I place the blame on him, then I won’t feel as bad for what I did. Even though that’s not quite fair to him.
“I’m sorry!” I yelled after him, but the thick wood trapped the sound in the room with me. He didn’t hear my apology.





*~*~*~*~*